My Two Days One Night Escapade to Malacca!

Being trigger-happy has its disadvantage.

There is the tendency to take far too many pictures; often to the extent that i have trouble organising them for a singular post in this blog! The good news is that i can be much more detailed!

So here goes a somewhat summary of my 2D1N visit to Malacca, with options to click for more information! 

I shall start from the very humble beginning - Golden Mile Complex where, as many of you are aware, is the place to go for coaches to Malaysia and even up to Hatyai (Thailand).

Taking the coach from Five Stars Tour! For a person who enjoys free movies on long distance coach journey, you should see the disappointment on my face when i couldn't find any! :(

And you know what's worse?! There was a sign on the bus for commuters to be silent! Me being quiet?!?! Not when i have no movie to rely on for the next few hours! So, chatter we did for almost four hours.  

Checked into the Mahkota Hotel's 2-bedroom apartment! Click here for more info. 

Went for the half day cultural tour arranged by my friend of over ten years! Check out the details here. Frankly, i would prefer to spend the time traversing the century-old streets of Malacca!

Went back to the hotel to dump our goodies. Took a piss in the hotel lobby's toilet and my eyes glanced up to the above artwork. Not sure about you but there was just an uncanny feeling about it.

No way am i going to leave out Jonker Street on weekend nights when its unmatched vibrancy really comes alive. Note, the crowd would be extremely bad on Saturdays. 

 

I posted a long entry on the pasar malam along Jonker Street around three months ago. There were not many differences so you can still rely on the information here. 

Not much doesn't mean don't have. This time round, the craze was on the uber adorable minions from the movie Despicable Me 2.

Posted this purely because i like the myriad of soft colours.

Create natural double eyelids in five minutes with no surgery and no medication!? Woah.... i should get it although on second thought, the lady manning the stall didn't appear to have double-eyelids... 

The stage was utilised this time for karaoke sessions! Love the hokkien songs so much that i almost wanted to scramble up on stage to belt out classics like "ai pia jia eh yia"!

Things were not cheap and as my sister would say; you might get a way better deal via online portals like Taobao.com. Well, i am an old school shopper and love to touch and feel the products i buy.

Breakfast the next day and this picture was taken without my knowledge! Damn, i can see a strand of grey hair! 

Crossing over the highway to the Mahkota Parade shopping centre! There was no traffic light, no pedestrian crossing and no bridge right across unless you are willing to walk around 300-500 meters from the hotel's entrance.

There are now quite a few shopping malls in Malacca in close proximity to Mahkota Parade. Do check out the newer ones like Dataran Pahlawan and Hatten Square, if you have time. 

As the rest focused on shopping in air-conditioned malls, my friend and i took to Jonker Street again! I wanted to eat Cendol whereas my friend wanted to buy some coffee from Calanthe Art Cafe.

My preference of coffee would be from this Sin Sing Coffee along Jonker Street, near to the performance stage. Note, i have always liked the buttery Southeast Asian coffee over the acidic Western coffee.

A group picture before we checked out! In case i have yet to share, my friend organised a trip for his staff and both Alex and I were invited along for it! *blessed*

It was a direct coach that sent us back to Singapore and took only three hours! By the way, anyone knows how i could visit these kelongs?

Reached Singapore using Second Link! 

*a big thank you to Dr Oh for the trip*! 

An Ideal Purchase for My Ass - The Wellness Bidet

Today, i am going to touch on a very sensitive spot for most, if not all people; the asshole. You read right; it's basically and literally the little hole in between your butt cheeks!

Without getting too gross, i am going to get to the point and announce to the whole world that i finally got a bidet for the toilet bowl in my house! 

What exactly is a bidet, some might ask?

To put it in very simple terms, the bidet is a device that would help wash your asshole (after your big business) with water, which is gentler and cleans better as compared to toilet paper. There are other benefits i would love to gush (pun unintended) in this blog but i think you would benefit better by just clicking here.

So, my order from Qoo10 (formerly known as Gmarket) came within three days in a plain little looking white box. For those who are interested, i paid S$84, inclusive of the S$5 delivery charge. 

The website is http://list.qoo10.sg/item/HIT-ITEM-IN-KOREA-WELLNESS-BIDET/407504542 although you can also purchase directly from the distributor via their website here. Do note that the price was higher than Qoo10 when i last checked. 

Expensive models with functions to warm seat and blow dry your asshole etc were available yet knowing my limited financial means, i would have to make do with the cheaper yet no doubt just as effective one; the non-electronic version. 

Installation was a breeze! 

The instruction leaflet was given for a reason; treat it as a valuable guide and follow every step carefully. Disregard it and you would likely get urine and shit water on your body! You could of course pay a nominal sum of money for a professional (honestly, you might as well just pay me) to install the bidet for you. 

Frankly, shitting has never felt so blissful in my house.

p.s. i know i have an ugly toilet bowl. 

Half Day Cultural Tour in Malacca - Jonker Street, Floating Mosque, Local Foodstuffs & Peranakan Dinner

Yeah! I am finally going to talk about the half day cultural tour i participated in Malacca shortly after we checked into Mahkota hotel. I have no idea how much it cost per person as my friend had reserved an entire bus for the tour!

Anyway, i was looking forward to cover more places than i did the last time i was at Malacca although one of the key attractions would no doubt be Jonker Street, our first stop of the tour.

Contrary to news report, the plan to reinstate the street back for motor vehicles at night had yet to be implemented. I did a check with a street vendor and she told me with skepticism, that the state government would not dare given the popularity of the night market along the street on weekends.

I am keeping my fingers crossed but shall enjoy it as much as it continues to exist. A photo entry on Jonker Street in the daytime was posted by me only three months ago and you can find more details by clicking here.

Nothing much seemed to have changed; even Jonker 88 continued to attract a queue that stretched out to the busy one-lane one-way road.

The famous one-bite durian puff by "taste better". I thought of purchasing them at night since i didn't want to hold up the others and the ending point of our "stop" was at the red building where San Shu Gong was located.

Massive crowd descending in San Shu Gong - most of us went crazy with our purchases. I was more tame as i knew exactly what i needed to buy; the yam biscuits!!! By the way, do ask for samples before you buy them.

Failed miniature function on my D7100 - my younger sister had difficulties understanding what i mean by entrances of Jonker Street. For those who are unaware, Jonker Street is a stretch of straight road with two ends and numerous streets that cut across it. There were two main entrances with visitors usually entering from the one near to Hard Rock Cafe, next to the red building and feature a noticeable junkboat right in front.

A fellow tour mate bought the durian puffs and he kindly offered one to me!!!!

Remember - don't bite. 

Take the whole piece, put it into your mouth and bite SLOWLY. Enjoy the soft buttery crust and the unstoppable flow of delicious durian puree down the throat!

Sight of the charming Sungei Melaka. I would have loved to take the boat ride but it was quite a hectic trip for us. Guess i would be making my way to Malacca again very soon in the future.

Directions given by the guide was a bit confusing; we were supposed to cross the bridge to the historical landmark (the stadthuys where we could take some pictures) and turn right where the tour coach would be waiting for us.

Queen Victoria Fountain - built in 1901, this was said to be the only functioning colonial fountain in Malaysia. I got this information from the web and not the guide.

Like the fountain, the Christ Church continued to function as the place of worship for Protestants with one big difference; it was completed a hundred and forty years earlier in 1753!

A view from Christ Church. As you can see, the stadthuys was closed for major renovation and i am unsure when it would re-open.

How could anyone ever miss the colourful trishaws?! For my post on them, please click here.

Walking past the re-constructed Malacca Fort. I almost took a wrong turn as the tour guide mentioned turn right, which in this case, led to two roads! Thankfully, my friend spotted the coach.

Seating in the air-conditioned coach was a cool respite from the killer hot weather outside! Next time would be a drive around Bukit Cina.

No picture (i sat on the wrong side of the bus) although i did manage to take a picture of the Muslim cemetery very near to Bukit Cina. Honestly, i might travel back to Malacca just to trek in the 42-hectare Chinese cemetery.

Question: Anyone knows what is Melaka named after (hint is in the above photograph)?

Answer": A tree known as Melaka! This name was given by the founder, Parameswara, who also happened to be the last king of Singapura; ruling it from 1389 to 1398.

Our next stop - Tan Kim Hock Local Products. Don't belittle this Dr Tan Kim Hock; he was actually the father of San Shu Gong's founder! It was said that differences in operating the business resulted in the younger Tan setting up a separate entity.

By this time, many of us had already purchased many packs of local products in San Shu Gong and hence, some of us loitered a while in the shop before making our way to the rest area outside.

To be totally honest, the bulk of us wanted to try the state dessert of Malacca; the chendol.

The hype was on durian chendol but as usual, i am sticking to my traditional type at RM 3.00; shaved ice topped with red beans, chendol soaked in a bowl of coconut milk and drizzled with a generous amount of gula melaka!

It wasn't exceptional although it wasn't as bad as Alex's proclamation. Guess the black flies added a certain element of disgust in Alex's review.

Floating Mosque - for more details. Click here please.

Last stop - a Peranakan dinner at Kapitan restaurant! Unlike my usual food posts, i am not going to touch on each individual dish as i have no idea on the cost and absolutely zero understanding on its location.

So here's what i am going to do. I would place them into two broad categories; the good and unimpressive. By the way, the fried chicken in mango sauce belonged to "unimpressive". Simple right?!

Other unimpressive dishes were as above. By unimpressive, please do not misunderstand that they were horrid and bad tasting. They were simply not exciting enough for me to remember.

The good as above. Soup was light flavoured yet laden with seafood; prawns were fresh and sauteed in a fragrant concoction of garlic and spring onion; brinjal was delightfully crispy; chendol was surprisingly nice although it was the watery version.

Nothing beats a dazzling setting sun to conclude the tour!